Always be Prepared!

Today is take your crossbow to work day. Just in case you encounter some Mayan zombie paratroopers.

Mayan Calendar

This evening I'm going to be prepping my bunker, just in case. It's interesting that the Mayans never predicted the end of the world on tomorrow's date. In fact, the date is only ever mentioned once in any known text we have. It is simply the end of the long count calendar. There is even a known writing that mentions dates far beyond the winter solstice of 2012. Yet somehow a bunch of people are trippin'. Is it still cool to say that?
Tomorrow marks the end of the 4th age. According to ancient Mayans, human beings first appeared at the beginning of the 4th age. So what happens in the 5th age? The calendar starts over from the beginning. A little anti-climactic, but still, it's always fun to prepare, just in case. If the world explodes or it magically rains fireballs, my bunker, or yours, or anyone's, probably won't save you, but it for some reason we have a total breakdown of society, or zombies... Better to be safe than sorry.
Consider this also, as you head to your end of the world parties, will you be happy with your choice of who you spent your last moments with? And when the world doesn't end, will you be grateful? Will you be thankful for things that you normally take for granted? Will the colors of nature be brighter, and the notes of a song be warmer? Probably not. I think most people stop appreciating life when they "grow up," it's sad really. The zombies appreciate your life, so much that they want to eat it! "RRRGGHBBBUUUD!!" That's zombie for, "Your life tastes delicious!"
I try to live as if the world is ending every day. Some days are better than others, but overall, I'd be okay if the world ended. ESPECIALLY, if I got to kill some zombies first.

Hand Crank USB charger

We have lots of Devices that charge using USB, some useful, some not so much. Nonetheless, at minimum it would be nice to have some music from your iPod, remember how important that was to Eli? (The Book of Eli) I will need this for my iPhone, which holds music, books, a calculator, notes, calendar, a flashlight, a camera and photos, a compass, and reminders. Think about it, even without working cell towers your smart phone still has uses. The Neewer USB Hand Power Dynamo Torch Charger is a super cheap option on Amazon, but if you're willing to spend a little more for your precious smart phone, there are some more durable options available.

Tactical Bacon

This is fully cooked bacon that comes in a can, and has a 10 year shelf life. Need I say more? Link.

Baseball Bat

Pull out the ol' Louisville Slugger ladies and gentleman, it's time to crack some zombie skulls!

Everyone has extravagant ideas of guns and chainsaws, samurai swords and pipe bombs, those people are why we are hiding underground for so long. Unless you own an ammunition factory, and a few silencers, you're going to want to give up on your assault rifle Rambo. Of course, we do want guns around, we want lots of guns, we have to remember that zombies aren't our only possible enemy in this scenario, but as for the zombies themselves... It won't take long before they are trained better than your Labrador to come looking for food whenever they hear a loud bang.

It's probably a good idea to avoid sharp objects too, everyone likes the katana in our favorite zombie killing video game, but it takes YEARS to become trained to properly use that weapon, and you're more likely to hurt yourself than a zombie without said training. As far as axes and machetes go, they will get stuck in EVERYTHING you swing at, so it won't be effective at fighting off multiple targets at once.

As boring as it sounds, we're probably going to want to stick to blunt objects. Carry that hand cannon with you just in case, but shooting a gun should be paired with running away fast, because you just rang the dinner bell for a bunch of brain hungry, flesh eating dead folk.

Knight XV

If you’ve got way too much money on your hands, and you’re running out of things to do with it, here’s your vehicle. Bullet proof glass, tires that don’t go flat, TWICE the size of a hummer, the Knight XV has more features than one can name. Unless, of course, you visit the Conquest Vehicles website, which lists all it’s features. The diesel engine also gives you more options for fuel, so you can keep moving. This is the ultimate luxury apocalypse vehicle, it even has a built in cigar humidor and a flatscreen so when you become ruler of the world you can cruise around evil genius style. 

For those of us who don’t own countries, we may have to be a little more flexible with our options. Wranglers, F150s, FJ Cruisers, just look for something with big tires, lots of ground clearance and four wheel drive, and don’t get too attached, when it runs out of gas or breaks down, go grab another vehicle. When time allows for siphoning gas and replacing parts, go ahead, but not while zombies are nearby. That’s foolish. “It’s not smart.” It’s a bad idea. “Don’t do it.” Do what? “Exactly.”

The Colony

The Colony is a great show to watch for research purposes. It's a reality TV show, and while there are no zombies, the scenario involves a viral outbreak. There's some useful info on this show, for instance, in the first season they create a windmill to generate electricity! "Baller." Take notes! It is something of a cross between a reality TV show and a documentary, complete with expert interviews!

Shows like this are hella useful to learn creative ways to survive. While The Colony is in a city environment, it's also a good idea to check out shows like Survivorman, Man vs Wild, and Dual Survival. Become comfortable with nature, this may be the best option for a staying alive. "Oh oh oh oh, staying aliiiiiive."

Big Ol' Bucket of Food

I woke up hungry this morning. That made me think about how hungry I would be all the time if all the farmers and ranchers turned into zombies. ::sad face:: 

We're all going to have to become good at the old hunting and gathering tricks. Learn about berries, those kinds of things. Although, most of our gathering will probably be from abandoned grocery stores. Here's the kicker though, you're going to have to have to wait until a lot of stupid, dangerous people die first, before you go into any type of store with valuable resources. A lot of people talk to me about their 'plans' for the zombocalypse that involve storming a gun store, and then a sporting good store, and then a grocery store. ::another sad face:: That's a good way to get killed. You know who owns gun stores? Gun enthusiasts, and those crazy old bastards are just waiting for you to try and steal their stash of guns and ammo. BOOM! Dead. 

Same with any other resource, you have to wait in hiding until there are less threats around. Not to mention, in the beginning, everybody will be going nuts, so there's no bargaining or talking sensical, they're just going to kill you and take all your stuff. Eventually, we're going to want to loot a grocery store, but until it is safe enough to do so, we are going to need to survive off of our own food pantry. 

Check out this Chef's Banquet ARK 1 Month Food Storage Supply, or, as I like to abbreviate it, this big ol' bucket of food. 330 servings totaling 2100 calories for 30 days, for one person. Grab some of these for each person in your group, put them in your safe house. Go ahead, do it right now, they have a 15 year shelf life. If 15 years comes up and we still haven't had an apocalyptic scenario, you can have an end of the world party in your basement and host a lousy meal for all your friends. All you got to do for these things is add water and eat, it's listed as a 20 minute prep time. Check out the market, I like this one because it's an even 30 days, and the bucket is a 6 gallon round bucket that you can use for many things, including attaching that Sawyer Filter to it. Other options have longer shelf lives and different options for meals. For your group it would probably be best to have a large spread of options, so get a lot of different ones.

My plan is to stay underground for 30 days, then come out when things cool down a bit. Don't forget that the living will be just as big of a threat as the dead, so wait until everyone kills each other before you parade around town. In order to go that, I'm going to need food, so I'm going to need a whole lot of these buckets. You also may want to stock up on a bunch of MREs and canned goods. If we're going to be underground for 30 days, we don't want anyone going all psycho on us because the menu didn't have enough selection.

Mossberg 500 Special Purpose

The Mossberg 500 Special Purpose is awesome. I was going to buy this model to the right next month after the busy holidays were over and I had some 'me' time, but my wife said she wants me to buy another pistol instead. "Is your wife the coolest wife ever!?" Yes. She is awesome. My jaw almost fell off when, instead of her saying, 'another gun? really?' she suggested a different gun. I was so excited I immediately agreed with her.

Click the link and check out all the different options. Also check out the 'ZMB' line, and yes, ZMB is short for ZoMBie. OMG!!! So much awesome is happening right now.

A 12 gauge is probably your most useful weapon for defending your fortress should a situation arrise where you absolutely HAD to shoot bullets. Bullets (or shells) are loud, so always avoid using them, despite what you see on The Walking Dead, also bullets are a VERY limited resource.

Should you have to use one, and it's a shotgun, anything between #4 shot and 000 should do just fantastic against a zombie head. The spread makes up for lousy aim. GO SHOTGUNS! Slugs are fun too, but why wear out your shoulder? "Wuss." Shut it!

Keep some slugs around for special jobs, like door hinges, or hunting. You might as well keep some birdshot for hunting birds, but DON'T use it against a zombie, because you will only rip his face off, and then he will look EVEN SCARIER when he eats you alive! Birdshot won't work, I promise, ask Dick Cheney.

Boots

My day to day involves a lot of walking. I'm pretty much walking just as much as I am sitting between the hours of 9 and 5. Think about it. That's a lot of walking. When I get home I do significantly more sitting. "Is this important?" YES! Everything I say is important!
Today during my walking, I have noticed that I have a squeaky boot, and no one likes a squeaky cowboy boot. EXCEPT ZOMBIES THAT WANT TO EAT YOUR BRAIN!!!


GGRRUUUGHLLLMMM!!! (That's zombie for "hey listen, is that someone walking? let's eat him.")

NOTE TO SELF: if in danger, remove boots.

Check out the boots that Oakley makes, they are WAY less noisy than my squeaky cowboy boot. Plus Oakley boots were worn by John Connor, which gives them bad-ass points as well. Did John Connor survive the apocalypse? "Yes." Then if you wear these boots you will too! At least thats my theory. It probably won't work. I probably won't ever buy these boots, but they sure are fancy! Get the 8 inch ones, zombies LOVE ankle meat. Plus, if you hurt your ankle, that would suck. PROTECT YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF!! "That's not how it goes." Who's blog is this!?

Anyway... regardless of your choice in brand, boots are important, don't overlook the little things.

Water Filters

Water is important. I promise. I have done a lot of research on water filters because of a non-profit I used to volunteer for, and also because I enjoy camping and hiking. There are many ways to filter water, but here are two filters that I recommend that are not personal water filters. Personal water filters are great, but traveling in a group has more advantages than disadvantages, and being in a group means you have to get water for a whole group.


Katadyn Base Camp Water Filter
This filter was chosen because it can transport, and filter water, without taking up a lot of space in your backpack. Being RIGHT NEXT to water isn't the best strategy, if a water source attracted you, then it will also attract other people, which may be dangerous to your group. So put one of these in your bug out bag so you can grab some water and get back to your camp. Fast, easy, safe water can save your life.

Sawyer Point Zero Two Filter
FACT: This is the only portable filtration device that can physically remove viruses from water. The Sawyer PointONE filter is a great filter, but depending on how the zombie virus is spread, this one may be necessary. The benefit of these sawyer filter kits (check out the website and look at all the options) is that you can attach them to almost anything that holds water; five gallon buckets, trash cans, you name it. Another benefit is that they will produce water WAY cleaner than is necessary. The Point Zero Two can be used to filter water for surgery in third world environments, for instance.

Intro

Almost all of my hobbies and interests are in some way related to preparation for survival. I'm going to blog about this phenomenon because nobody can stop me.
[dramatic break]
Hobbies... I like guns. A LOT. I like shooting them, looking at them, touching them, cleaning them, taking them to dinner, "wait what?" never mind. "awkward..." Guns seems to be in the hobby category, and also the interest category. I also enjoy hunting, which is good, because it is related to another hobby of mine, which is eating. I like to camp, hike, and all that outdoorsy stuff. I have collections of knives and lighters, which are also useful for survival. That pretty much sums up relevant, very broad categories for this blog. I'll probably talk about some movies and TV shows as well.
There will be no rhyme or reason to post order, mostly because I cannot figure out a way to do that, so posts shall be random, based on whatever I want to post about.

The End.